nehllah

http://wedding.mwm-tech.com/

More pictures and stuff as soon as they are uploaded.

I took Loki to the vet today ... he's a girl :P. Oops.

He's a 6 or 7 week old Maine Coon mix, we haven't named him yet.

Mike proposed this morning!!

Things are finally looking up for Mike and I. We're getting into a decent routine (one where i don't skip half my classes) and i don't feel smothered. I'm looking forward to getting a job up here and not having to go home every weekend. We still have a long way to go but i'm optimistic for once.

So for a long time i have known that there was something not right with me, i finally set about looking for a name to put to my syptoms this weekend. And i believe i have depersonalization disorder.

Who ever wrote this describes it way better than i can:
"Depersonalization disorder is marked by a feeling of detachment or distance from one's own experience, body, or self. These feelings of depersonalization are recurrent. Of the dissociative disorders, depersonalization is the one most easily identified with by the general public; one can easily relate to feeling as they in a dream, or being "spaced out." Feeling out of control of one's actions and movements is something that people describe when intoxicated. An individual with depersonalization disorder has this experience so frequently and so severely that it interrupts his or her functioning and experience. A person's experience with depersonalization can be so severe that he or she believes the external world is unreal or distorted."

..... probably i wont though :P

I do many dumb things. Like today when i got and the Northway and drove until the weather told me to turn around .. this occured somwhere between Lake George and Lake Placid.

So..... i'm at Albany now ....

Mike is eating peanut butter on garlic triscuits. ........................... EWWWWW as i type this he has added peperjack cheese to the mix.

I'm so going to get mercury poisioning. I eat tuna atleast 5 times a week :P

After events (which i don't feel like tallking about) that took place last night i'd like everyone to take a minute to realize what a shitty shitty friend i am and, for your own good, stay the fuck away from me. But if you're really really brave you could just give me a hug instead.

I know this is going to end up at least 50% BNL so i'll just take it to the next step and say from the start that i'm only using BNL songs.

Your Life: The Soundtrack:

Opening credits: Never do Anything

Waking up: Light up My Room

Average day: Life, in a Nutshell

First date: Conventioneers

Falling in love: Am I The Only One

Love scene: (there is very little logic behind this one, it justs makes sense in my head) Wrap Your Arms Around me

Fight scene: Just a Toy

Breaking up: (I'm going to put several answers here because there are so many possible break up scenerios) Break Your Heart, Have You Seen My Love

Getting back together: (same thing as breaking up, more than one scenerio) Upside Down, Everything Old is New Again

Secret love: (I'm not entirely sure what is meant by secret love but this is the best interpretation of that for my life) Off the Hook

Life's okay: The Old Appartment

Mental breakdown: When I Fall

Driving: (simply because i find myself singing this on every long drive i make) Tonight is the Night i Fell asleep at the Wheel

Learning a lesson: Aluminum

Deep thought: Call and Answer

Flashback: (I have utterly no idea, a flashback of what? that really makes a difference, oh screw it i'll just put something) Pinch Me

Partying: Alcohol (keep in mind i fully understand the meaning of this song)

Happy dance: (this is kind of a dumb one deserving of only and incredibly dumb song) Another Postcard

Regreting: In the Car or The Flag

Death scene: Next Time

I'm really embarrassed by this picture. It's me at the hight of my fatness. http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v328/Nehllah/100_0341.jpg I took the picture around christmas time, but i didn't really start to do anything about my weight until 3 weeks ago. So this is roughly what i looked like 3 weeks ago.
This is me around the 4th of July. http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v328/Nehllah/100B0510.jpg

I haven't lost a whole lot of weight (10 pounds and i dropped almost 2 pants sizes) I have a long long way to go but i can definitely see a difference. :) I'm starting to get curvy again :)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v328/Nehllah/100_1001.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v328/Nehllah/3edf0024.jpg
I HAVE A CHIN (singular) :biggrin:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v328/Nehllah/100_0781.jpg

I'm a really pitiful human being. Can someone put me out of my misery already?

My focus is fixed and back in my drive way. Oh how i missed him :) Who wants a visit from me?